Laughter With Tear
A true story
The author: Pajdee Thao
The story of laughter with tear happened during the raining season in July 1975. During this time, it was unsettling for the Hmong because many leaders were sent for re-education and some were forced out of the country. Many groups of Lao Hmong citizens came together in Nasou to prepare a journey to Vientiane, the capitol city of Laos. The groups thought that the government would allow them to take the journey since there were many innocent citizens. But it was the contrary. The following story paint their journey from Nasou, their massacre, and their return to Nasou.
In Nasou, the Hmong prepared simple foods, cloths, utensils, and blankets. Once the preparations were completed, they were ready to set out on a long journey. There were many people, but I did not know the exact number. I saw many people and they formed a long line. The people believed that the road would be open and no one would stop them. They had a great feeling about this journey. Some even sang songs of migration. I recall a Hmong saying, snake catching the tail of another snake. This meant that each group/family would follow another group closely without any gap. We spent two full days and two nights traveling before coming to the bridge of Hin Heup. Hin Heup is a town near Vientiane, Laos. In this town, the road was very muddy and sticky so our sandals were stock in the mud road and no one dared to retrieve them because we wanted to keep our pace with our family and to maintain our line of traveling. What I saw were many sandals that were stuck in the mud: some twisted and others pointing out.
On the third day, near the Hin Heup bridge as the sun rose, people made a line of a snake catching the tail of a snake again. Not long, the frontline approached the bridge. Gun shots erupted quickly by soldiers who guarded the bridge. I heard people calling out that the shots were real and that people had been shot. After hearing the word of turning back, everyone started running in the opposite direction. I saw a baby who was being carried in front of her mom being struck by a shot and lost three fingers, and only the thumb and pinky remained. The baby cried out and her blood was streaming out. Her mom put a pad to cover the baby’s wound and moved quickly past me. My uncle Noua Vang fell down in front of me. He had been shot in his spine. His brothers picked him up and carried him away. Another young lady who had three children was also shot and fell down. As a result, her husband quickly released himself from his baby carrier. He had a girl carry his baby as he carried his wife. They moved quickly out of sight. My dad led our family, following the crowd, and we came across a dead man. I saw people stepping over him and no one stopped to help. His family might have known that he was dead, so they left him behind.
As people began running back, the call for a snake to catch the tail of another snake was silent. No group followed another group and the line of people had disbursed. Each person saved his/her own life and each family saved its own members. All the sandals that were stuck in the mud disappeared. “Did people retrieve their sandals? How did they recognized their sandals”, I thought. The actual disappearance of the sandals was that people stepped on them and they were buried under the mud. It took us two days and two nights to come to Hin Heup, but we arrived back in Nasou in only one day. On the next day light, I saw only a few people and realized that some people did not return to Nasou and others might move on to other villages.
Happy faces with laughter occurred at the beginning, but sad faces with tears caught up at the end. The journey began with a solid line with a great hope. It ended with a returning journey that was a broken line with empty hope. On the going trip, people were happy talking while they were walking. On the returning trip, people were sad and mostly silent. This is an eight-year old’s account. Each person had his/her unique account on that journey. In my account, I saw four people who were shot, but over hundred people were injured and 14 people were killed.
While thinking about this event, I feel the need for love and hold one another forever.
Luag Nrog Kuamuag
Neejneeg muaj tseeb
Tus sau: Pajdib Thoj
Txoj kev luag nrog kuamuag tshwmsim rau lub caij ntujnag lub 7 hli, xyoo 1975. Ntu no cov neeg nyob tsis tus vim ntau tus thawj coj raug xa mus xammanas thiab ib txhia raug ncaws tawm tebchaws. Ntau pab pejxeem Hmoob Blog tau los sibsau rau hauv lub zos Naxus thiab baj kev mus rau Veescas, lub tuam nroog hauv tebchaws Blog. Sawvdaws xav tias tej nom tej tswv yov tso kev rau lawv vim lawv yog cov pejxeem coob coob uas tsis paubtab dabtsi. Tiamsis nws tsis yog li lawv xav. Zaj no yuav piav txog txoj kev lawv taug, txoj kev lawv raug tua, thiab txoj kev lawv khiav rovqab rau Naxus.
Hauv Naxus, cov neeg baj mejis khoom noj, khaubncaws hnav, lauj kaub dais diav, thiab pamvov. Thaum baj txhij lawm, lawv tau pib taug txoj kev deb. Cov neeg coob coob kawg, tiamsis kuv tsis paub tias yog pes tsawg leej. Kuv tsuas pom cov neeg sawv tsheej phiaj thiab taug kev tsheej kab gausgoo xwb. Cov neeg cia siab tias txoj kev yuav qhib lug thiab yuav tsis muaj neeg tav lawv kev. Vim lawv tso siab rau txoj kev tsiv zaum no, tej tug thiaj hais kwvtxhiaj tsiv teb tsaws chaw. Ib tug thiaj qw kom sawvdaws ua nab noj nab tw. Nov txhais tias sawvdaws yuav taug kev sib txuas zws uas tsis muaj ntu nrug. Peb tuaj tau 2 hnub txwm thiab pw ob hmo tom kev. Uantej peb yov mus txog tus choj Heemhawj. Heemhawj yog ib zos uas nyob ze lub nroog Veescas, tebchaws Blog. Ntawm lub zos no, txoj kev gos thiab blaum heev. Yogli, peb cov khau khiab thiaj lhe tas rau hauv txoj kev thiab tsis muaj tus dhawj cov khau vim peb maj raws peb tsev neeg thiab cov neeg. Neeg cov khau khiab uas plam rau hauv txoj kev: sab zij thiab tsa li cas los muaj.
Hnub 3, peb raug tua ntawm taw choj thiab muaj ntau yam li yov hais mus wiv no. Sawv wovtsees, sawvdaws rov ua nab noj nab tw thiab peb mus tsis ntev ces cov uantej txawm los ze rau ntawm tus taw choj Heemhawj. Phom cia li pib nrov sib nrhav thiab cov ua ntej qw tias, “Lawv tsis yog hem. Raug neeg lawm nawj. Cia li rovqab.” Cov neeg khiav vigvoog rov qab. Kuv pom ib tug mos ab uas leej niam ev nws rau ntawm xubntiag raug tua. Tus me ab no cov ntivtes phab laug tu 3 tug nruab nrab, tshuav tus ntivtxoo thiab tus rwgqab. Jhav txuasjos thiab tus me ab quaj tsheejna. Leej niam muab kiag ib daim ntaub los pog kiag txhais tes thiab cia li khiav ceevrooj los hla peb. Dablaug Nuam Vaj ntog nreem ntawm kuv hau ntej vim lawv tua raug nws tus txha nqajqaum. Nws cov kwvtij muab nws phaj kiag khiav lawm. Ib tug pom niam hluas uas muaj 3 tug menyuam kuj raug tua thiab qaug thaws. Nws tus txiv txo kiag tus mos ab rau ib tug whais ev thiab cug loo nrobqaum ev nws tus pojniam thiab khiav mus ploj pliag lawm. Kuv txiv coj peb tsevneeg caum cov neeg los pom ib tug txivneej tuag. Cov neeg hla tus tuag no los lawm pes roos, tsis muaj tus xyuas nws li. Tej thaum nws cov neeg yeej paub tias nws tsis muaj sia lawm es lawv thiaj tso nws tseg.
Thaum sawvdaws khiav rovqab, lub suab hu tias ua nab noj nab tw jiag moo to. Tseeb tiag, sawvdaws tsis taug kev li qub lawm. Nyias taus nyias huas siav thiab nyias taus nyias vuag nyias tsevneeg. Sawvdaws cov khau khiab uas tau plam rau hauv kev ploj tas tibsi. “Puas yog sawvdaws rov los sau tas lawm? Ua cas lawv ho paub tias lawv gawm khau yog gawm twg?”, kuv xav. Qhov tseeb, cov neeg muab cov khau tsuj ploj tas rau hauv cov pas av gos lawm. Thaum mus peb siv 2 hnub, tiamsis thaum rov peb siv ib hnub xwb. Hnub tshiab tshwm tuaj, kuv pom cov neeg tsawg lawm ces kuv thiaj xav tias ib txhia tsis rov los rau Naxus thiab ib txhua khiav dhau Naxue mus rau lwm qhov chaw lawm.
Txoj kev luag yam li tshwm rau thaum pib, tiamsis txoj kev kuamuag tshwm rau thaum xaus. Thaum mus, sawvdaws taug kev tsheej pab li mus uasi thiab muaj kev cia siab. Thaum rov, sawvdaws sib tawg tas thiab kev cia siab qhuav li qhawv. Thaum mus, sawvdaws sov siab tham luag whi. Thaum rov, sawvdaws lub siab qhuaj dhi thiab tsis ua suab sab li. Nov yog tus menyuam 8 xyoo txoj kev pom thiab paub. Txhua tus uas taug txoj kev no, nyias yov muaj nyias ib zaj los piav. Ntawm kuv xub ntiag, kuv pom 4 tug raug tua, tiamsis qhov tseeb 14 leeg raug tuag thiab tshaj pua leej raug mob.
Lus wiv:
- Thaum xav txog txoj kev tsim txom no, tsimnyog peb xaiv tej lus zoo los hais thiab sib phws taub-hau mus li ib txhis.
- Tsis paub meej tias cov tua neeg yog pabpawg twg: Blog dawb los Blog liab.
(Cov tsis paub tab tseem liam rau Hmoob: leej twg tua los peb tsuas liam rau tus thawj, the prime minister).
- 3 tug uas kuv pom raug mob: 1 tug nyob Mekas thiab 2 tug kuv tsis paub nyob twg.